Knock You Down
by purplepagoda
Summary: Matt has left, and Betty misses him, but she won't be missing him for long. Things are about to change for Betty Suarez. Sometimes things just happen at the wrong time. Who will be there to help Betty through this tough time? She'll find an unlikely ally.
1. Chapter 1

She wakes up in a cold sweat. She sits up in bed, and looks around the room. She listens carefully, and hears nothing out of the usual. Then she hears someone snoring. She looks around her bedroom, but sees no one else. She flings back the covers, and makes her way out of the room. She finds someone sleeping on the couch.

"Amanda why are you on my couch? You live across the hall."

Amanda continues to snore. Betty shakes her, "Amanda wake up." Amanda sits up and looks at her, "Oh, hi Betty."

"Why are you in my apartment?"

"I couldn't find my key to my apartment last night. Then I remembered that I still had a key for your apartment so..."

"You just decided to crash on my couch?"

"I didn't have a choice. I lost my cell phone."

"Then what's that?" Betty asks pointing to the phone on the floor, next to the couch.

"Betty! You found it."

"How late were you out last night?"

"Late," she admits.

"Get up we've got to go to work."

"Is something wrong Betty?"

"No why would you think that?"

"You just act like something is wrong."

"I just had a weird dream."

"Ooh tell me about it."

"You don't want to hear it."

"Sure I do."

"So I dreamt that I woke up and something... someone was crying."

"You?"

"No. I got out of bed, and went to the closet."

"Someone was in your closet?"

"In the dream there was a baby sitting in my closet."

"Weird."

"That's not the weird part."

"It's not?"

"No. The baby was Matt."

"What?"

"It was a baby, but it had Matt's face."

"So it had a huge head?"

"No, just Matt's face," Betty admits.

"That's not weird. You just miss Matt. After all he is whiny like a baby."

"You don't think that it's weird? You don't think it means anything do you?"

"No. Like what?"

"I don't know," Betty shrugs.

"Or maybe you're having Matt's baby," Amanda smiles.

"Not funny. I'm definitely not."

"Are you sure?"

"Amanda don't be ridiculous."

"Am I being ridiculous?"

"You're hung-over."

"That doesn't mean that I'm wrong. I assume that the two of you were having sex right?"

Betty doesn't answer.

"So it's not impossible," Amanda points out.

"I'm not."

"Are you sure? Did you take a test?"

"You have to swear not to tell anyone."

"Tell anyone what?"

"I thought that I was, but I took a test, and I wasn't."

"When?"

"Before Christmas."

"Maybe the test was wrong."

"Amanda I'm not pregnant. It was just a dream."

"Whatever," she rolls her eyes and gets off the couch.

"Where are you going?"

"Home," Amanda answers.

Betty goes to her room to get dressed. She gets dressed, washes her face, and brushes her teeth. She puts her toothbrush back in the medicine cabinet. On the bottom shelf she eyes an unopened box of tampons. She closes the cabinet, and finishes getting ready.

She steps out of her apartment just as Amanda is leaving. She locks the door behind her, and starts down the hall.

"Where is Marc?"

"He already left."

"Oh."

"Why?"

"No reason," she answers nervously.

"Betty..."

"What?"

"Why are you so on edge?"

"I'm not," she lies.

Amanda turns to look at her. "Betty! You think that I'm right. You're..."

Betty quickly cuts her off, "No. I'm not."

"Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure."

"This morning you were certain. Are you having doubts?"

"I don't know," she shrugs.

"You have to find out."

"I know."

When Betty returns from work she heads straight home. She gets to the apartment, unlocks the door, and flips on the light. She finds Amanda on her couch once again.

"I have got to get the locks changed."

"I brought you a present," Amanda tells her.

"So that's why you broke into my apartment?"

"I didn't break in. I have a key."

"Which is why I have to get the locks changed."

Amanda gets up off the couch and grabs the brown paper bag next to her. She hands it to Betty.

"What is it?" Betty questions.

"Just take it," Amanda insists.

Betty eyes her suspiciously, and then unfolds the top of the bag. She looks inside, and then returns her glance to Amanda.

"Go," Amanda demands.

"I..."

"Go. I'll wait."

"Why? Why are you doing this?"

"You shouldn't have to do this alone," Amanda admits.

"I'm sure that..."

"Betty just go take it."

"Ok," Betty agrees heading to the bathroom. She returns to the living room about a minute later.

"Did you take it?"

"Yeah."

"You're not going to wait in there?"

"No. I'm going to make dinner."

"So why do you think that you're not?"

"I feel fine."

"That doesn't mean anything."

"Amanda I'm sure that I'm not."

"Did you set a timer?"

"Yeah, on my phone," she hands Amanda the phone, and then goes into the kitchen. She starts rifling through cabinets pulling out pots, and boxes. Betty says nothing, she just starts dinner. The timer beeps, and she looks at Amanda.

"I'll go," Amanda tells her as she makes her way to the bathroom.

Betty goes to look for her when she doesn't come right back. She stops in the door way of the bathroom, and finds Amanda siting on the lid of the toilet.

"Well?"

Amanda hands the tissue with the plastic stick in it to Betty.


	2. Chapter 2

"I'm sorry," Amanda tells her.

"This has to be wrong," Betty says in denial.

"Do you want me to go get another one?"

"No," she answers.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"Betty."

Betty tosses the plastic stick in the trash can and washes her hands. She leaves the bathroom, and returns to the kitchen. Amanda follows her. Betty tries to hold it together, but as she stands over the pot of water the tears begin to fall. Amanda silently offers her a tissue. Betty turns the burner off, and walks away from the stove. She walks out of the kitchen and takes a seat on the couch. She buries her head in her hands.

"Betty it's going to be ok."

Betty looks up at her, and wipes tears from her face. "Of course you'd say that. You're not having a baby."

"Maybe the test was wrong."

"I doubt it."

"What can I do for you?"

"Please just leave."

"Ok," Amanda agrees.

Much to Betty's surprise Amanda doesn't tell anyone, not even Marc. Two weeks later Betty still hasn't told anyone.

March 9th 10 A.M.:

"Betty where are you going?" Daniel asks.

"I have an appointment."

"You do?"

"Yes I've got an orthodontist appointment. I told you about it two weeks ago. Remember?"

"No."

"Well I've got to go, or I'm going to be late."

"Right, go ahead," he agrees.

She arrives at the doctors office, and fills out some paperwork. She's barely finished when she gets called back. She stares at the ceiling nervously as the doctor performs his exam. The doctor studies the screen carefully.

"Everything looks great," he tells her.

She makes eye contact with him, as he turns the screen towards her. Suddenly a noise fills the room. "We've got a nice strong heartbeat," he reveals.

"So that's..." she struggles with the words as she stares at the blob on the screen.

"That's your baby."

She says nothing, she just stares at the screen. He finishes, and gives her a prescription, and a picture. She gets dressed, and quickly returns to Mode. She slips into a meeting just before it begins. The takes a seat next to Amanda. Wilhelmina begins to speak, but Betty doesn't hear a word of what she says. Everyone gets up, and starts to leave. Betty gets up, and stops Amanda.

"I don't know what I'm doing," she admits.

Amanda hands her a note, "I thought that you might be a little distracted."

"Thanks."

"Are you going to cook tonight?"

"I cook every night, why?"

"Your cooking is better than Marc's."

"I won't tell him that you said that."

"Can I come over?"

"Of course," Betty agrees.

She's just finished making dinner when Amanda arrives. She comes in without knocking. She just waltzes in and takes a seat on the couch, as Betty puts dinner on plates.

"So how was your orthodontist appointment?"

"You talked to Daniel?"

"Of course," Amanda nods as Betty brings her a plate. She hands Amanda the plate, and takes a seat next to her, on the couch.

"So how did it go?"

"Terrible."

"Terrible? What happened?"

Betty sits her plate on the coffee table, and gets off the couch. She takes her purse off the counter, and pulls out the picture. She puts the purse down, and returns to the couch. She hands the picture to Amanda.

"What is it?"

Betty looks at the picture, "It's upside down."

Amanda turns it the other way. "Oh..."

"It just looks like a blob."

"I thought that it might be kind of like abstract art where I'm supposed to figure out what it's supposed to look like."

"No."

"So you're really pregnant?"

"Yup."

"Have you told Matt?"

"I haven't told anyone."

"You have to tell Matt."

"I can't. I don't know how to reach him."

"Haven't you heard from him at all?"

"I got a letter from him. He's decided to stay a whole year, instead of just six months."

"So write him a letter."

"I don't want him to have to come back."

"You're having his baby. It is his baby right?"

"Of course."

"What are you going to do? The baby will be here before he gets back."

"I know that."

"You're going to do it alone?"

"I don't know what I'm going to do Amanda."

"You don't have to keep it. You could..."

"I think that I want to."

"You think? You better be sure, it's not something you can give back."

"I know."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know."

After Amanda leaves Betty calls Hilda.

"Hello?"

"Hilda..."

"What Betty? Is something wrong? You sound funny."

"Can you come over?"

"Why?"

"Please just come over," Betty begs.

"Ok. I'll see you in a little while," she hangs up.

Betty is already in her pajamas when Hilda arrives.

"What's wrong?"

"Why do you automatically assume that something is wrong?"

"You don't call your big sister to come into the city to your apartment at eight o'clock at night unless something is wrong."

"Maybe I just missed you."

"If you just missed me, you'd come to me. What is going on?"

"Calm down."

"Are you hurt? Did something happen? Is Matt ok?"

"He's fine... I think."

"So what then?"

"I need some advice."

"I couldn't give you advice over the phone?"

"I thought that we should do it in person."

"Are you sick? Betty what is going on?"

"I'm scared."

"About what?"

"I don't know what to do."

"About what?"

"I don't know if I can do this on my own."

"Do what?"

"I'm just so confused."

Hilda stares at Betty for a few seconds and then asks, "Do what on your own?"

"Raise a kid," she answers on the verge of tears.

"What? Why would you ask that? Are you pregnant?" Hilda questions in alarm.

"I didn't know who else to talk to."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive. I had a doctor's appointment today."

"Oh, Betty," Hilda hugs her tightly.


	3. Chapter 3

After an irritatingly long meeting everyone starts to file out of the room. Betty is nearly to the door when she hears a sharp voice.

"Betty I want to see you in my office," Wilhelmina tells her.

Wilhelmina starts out of the room, and Betty stands frozen with her head hung in shame.

"Now," she demands.

Betty follows Wilhelmina into her office. "Shut the door," Wilhelmina barks before she reaches her desk. Betty closes the door, and Wilhelmina takes a seat at her desk. Betty stops at the desk staring at the floor.

"Have a seat," she insists.

Betty reluctantly pulls out the chair and takes a seat across from Wilhelmina. "Did I do something wrong?" Betty asks.

"What's wrong with you?"

Betty finds herself confused by the question. "I..." she stammers.

"It's a simple question. What is wrong with you?"

"Why are you asking?"

"I usually don't take an interest in other people's lives."

"So why are you?"

"You mope around here all day."

"I'm sorry?"

"I'm sorry that whatever is going on in your personal life is affecting your work. Your last piece was... it wasn't good."

"I'll do better," she answers.

"I've never agreed with your fashion choices, but lately they've been..."

"What's wrong with my fashion choices lately? Black is very sophisticated."

"It's just not you."

"I'm sorry?"

"Don't be sorry. Just get over whatever it is that is bothering you."

"I'll try."

"You'll try? Betty if you aren't up to doing your job, then I can find someone else who is willing to do it."

"I know, and I apologize."

"Don't apologize. Just do better."

"I'll try."

"You'll try? That wasn't the answer I was looking for."

"I will do better," Betty answers half-heartedly.

"I know that I'm going to hate myself for asking this, but what is going on with you?"

"Nothing. It's not important. You're right, I shouldn't let my personal life affect my work."

"But it is."

"Yes," Betty nods.

"Is it going to continue to affect your work."

"Probably."

"Probably?"

"I don't foresee the issue resolving itself anytime soon."

"What issue?"

"I'm not like you I can't channel everything into my career."

"What are you talking about?"

"Nothing. Can I go, please?" she asks pushing the chair away, slowly rising.

"No. Sit back down," Wilhelmina demands.

Betty complies.

"You're not done until I say so," Wilhelmina reminds her.

"Fine," she crosses her arms childishly.

"Betty you love your job, but lately you act as if you don't want to be here."

"I want to be here, but..."

"But what?"

"I've got a lot going on in my life right now," she admits.

"We all do."

"I know."

"Please just spit it out. I don't have all day for this. Just tell me so that you can get back to work."

"No. I can't."

"You can't? Why not?"

"I... don't want to do this. I don't want to have this conversation with you."

"We're having it, so just tell me what is going on."

"Why do you care anyway?"

"If you don't want to tell me, then don't, but you will do better."

"Maybe I should take a leave of absence."

This peaks Wilhelmina's interest. "Why would you do that?"

"I don't know how to focus on my job, and deal with this."

"With what?"

"How did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Nothing, never mind."

"How did I do what?" Wilhelmina locks eyes with Betty.

"How did you stay so focused on your career no matter what was going on in your personal life?"

"It keeps me from going insane. Focusing on my career has kept me from going over the edge."

"I don't know if I can do that. I don't know if I can do any of this."

"Do what?"

Betty looks into Wilhelmina's eyes. "I don't want to be like you," she answers.

"No one said you are."

"But I could be, sometimes I catch myself doing things and thinking, 'This is something Wilhelmina would do,". I don't want to be like you."

"Be like me how?"

"Choose my career over everything else."

"I haven't chosen my career over everything else."

"You haven't? What about your daughter? You chose your career over her."

"I had to remain focused on my career to give her everything that she could ever need."

"I don't think you did a very good job, because all she ever needed was you."

"I didn't do the greatest job, and if I could go back and change things, but I can't. There is no use living in the past."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. It was out of line."

"Why the sudden interest in Nico, anyway?"

"No reason," she lies.

"Are you pregnant?"

Betty says nothing, she doesn't make a move either.

"Betty answer me," Wilhelmina demands.

Betty shakes her head. When she looks up with Wilhelmina her eyes are full of tears. "I can't do this," she answers.

Wilhelmina hands her a tissue. Betty wipes her eyes, and blows her nose. She tosses the tissue in the wastepaper basket near the desk. "I'm sorry," she apologizes, "I should go." She gets out of her seat and turns to leave. She's almost to the door when Wilhelmina's voice stops her, "Don't. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do it."

Betty spins around, "I'm not even twenty six. I'm not ready to have a kid."

"Being ready has nothing to do with it. It happens whether you're ready or not. It's how you handle it that makes all the difference."


End file.
